Archive for September, 2008

John McCain is a Cylon

Monday, September 1st, 2008

429Truth has uncovered a deeply troubling discovery at the highest levels of power. Many have noticed that short-tempered Vietnam war veteran John McCain, imprisoned and tortured in Hanoi, bears a more than passing resemblance to short-tempered Cylon war veteran Saul Tigh, imprisoned and tortured on New Caprica:

And it’s also easy to see a resemblance between John McCain’s blonde wife Cindy McCain and Saul Tigh’s blonde wife, Ellen Tigh:

And of course John McCain’s active duty military son Jack McCain looks a lot like Admiral Adama’s active duty military son Lee Adama.

This could have been written off as simple coincidence until last week when John McCain chose an inexperienced formerly obscure politician (governor of Alaska) and abortion opponent named Sarah Palin, catapulted into the national spotlight as candidate for Vice President. The story bears an uncanny resemblance to Laura Roslin, an inexperienced formerly obscure politician (Secretary of Education) and abortion opponent catapulted into the highest ranks of fleet government as President.

And Sarah Palin’s daughter Bristol Palin bears an eerie similarity to Cally Tyrol…

Bristol’s partner Levi Johnston bears a more than passing similarity to Cally’s husband Galen Tyrol

And both the Palin and Tyrol couples have produced children who have become the focus of much drama and speculation.

What can we learn from this? Laura Roslin became president after a devastating surprise attack destroyed our society and way of life. A surprise terrorist attack by a shadowy and powerful organization with agents positioned in the highest levels of government. Agents so well-hidden that even they do not know they are agents, yet able to be switched on remotely to rain unimaginable destruction upon us. And who is the highest-ranking Cylon terrorist in the Colonial fleet? John McCain, aka Saul Tigh.

Who better to manage the uncovering of enemy agents than an enemy agent positioned at the highest levels of power? If we used this surprising evidence to call McCain a “Manchurian Candidate” – a dangerous replicant and one-man sleeper cell sent by our extraterrestrial enemies to destroy us in our sleep – we would not be the first.